Last modified: 7:58 AM Saturday, 14 January 2017

This just in:

Al-Gebra cult conclusively linked to Iran

More feared by middle-school students than Al-Qaida and all its ilk combined, the infamous Al-Gebra cult has been traced to its origins in Baghdad, Iraq, where it was founded by Iranian “mathematician” Abu Abdullah Muhammad bin Musa al-Khwarizmi (pictured below on a stamp distributed by the post-Soviet international communist conspiracy to undermine America’s self-esteem, one D-minus at a time) in the early ninth century. The name, ominously, derives from the Arabic al-jabr: the restoration.

Abu Abdullah Muhammad bin Musa al-Khwarizmi

Abu Abdullah Muhammad bin Musa al-Khwarizmi founded the Al-Gebra cult in the ninth century, with what sinister purpose we now begin to suspect.
[ Image Source ]

Hmm. Now what could these Muslim “mathematicians” have been planning to “restore”? A global caliphate? Obviously, this cult bears watching, and it is rumored that the George W. Bush administration has had it under Department of Homeland Security surveillance at least since 2006.


Speaking of Bush: Since he’s quoted to good effect in this article, I wonder if he’d care to comment on the fact that it is possible for a person of ordinary intelligence and manual dexterity to count up to 99 using only his fingers and thumbs.


George W. Bush tries his hand at bimanual notation

George W. Bush tries his hand at bimanual notation.
[ Image Source ]

Well ... keep working on it.

Originally published as a review of a humor article about the Al-Gebra cult.

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